#1. When I sell on EBay, I make it very clear that I am NOT responsible for ''other countries mail system''. Some aren't as good as the USA. So, your mail system messed up, you get the money from them.
#2. Yes, too drastic! After all, he was willing to ship the wing back to you at your shipping cost. The USA mail system got it to Sweden. Sweden's mail system mess up.
#3 He has offered to refund for the wing or send it. That is 100% reliability to me. Again! NOT his fault that YOUR mail system screwed up!
#4. You are the reason that a LOT of guys won't sell International from the USA. Belly up to the bar, take the shipping hit, and if you don't want the wing, take his refund of the wing minus shipping. He did his job by getting it to Sweden the first time! Again, YOUR Country screwed up!!
I am also sure that you wanted the cheapest shipping, due to not wanting to spend the extra to have it shipped by a commercial carrier, such as UPS, FedEX, DHL, and probably even on your own airline counter to counter.
I value your opinions, but I get the feeling you wrote them down before thinking them through all the way...
#1. No, the seller had NO disclaimer in the Ebay ad. And it is mot MY mail system, it is US Mail who chose to use them, it is US Mail who has accepted the delivery WITH a tracking number and sign-on-receipt, and I would say it is therefor US Mail who is responsible for refunding the seller when their service wasn't fulfilled. How they choose to charge the Swedish Post System really is out of my hands.
#3. No, it is not the sellers fault the package never arrived to me, but I still feel the seller should at least try to reclaim the shipping cost from US Mail. But, as others already have told me, that doesn't seems to be the practice in the United States. Whether it's because of lazyness, lack of customer support, stubborness from US Mail, or just because he already got paid doesn't even matter anymore - the result is just the same: I do not receive what I have paid for.
#4. I'm not familiar with the expression "belly up the bar", but I can't see anything new in your answer to this point.
No, I didn't choose cheapest shipping - I chose the only shipping the seller offered, so the shipping method was entirely his choice.