OK, you Norvelites....
02-10-2003, 12:44 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
As soon as I picked him up, he started whimpering like some little girlie-mon. He said that it wasn't his idea....he had been forced into it by a cowardly anti-American Cox hate group. He whined over and over that he didn't deserve the same vicious treatment one of my good friends had been subjected to a few days ago. My poor friend had been slowly torn asunder and just before his death, the demented perverts had even tried to pull his rod off! God only knows what those sickos were trying to accomplish.
02-10-2003, 12:44 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
....have gone too far this time! I was investigating strange noises coming from the DickeyBird Aviation workshop late last night when whap!....my high-tech security system caught this little pusillanimous cretin red-handed. He was obviously spying in the Top Secret section of my engine development lab.
02-10-2003, 12:45 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
I tried but just couldn't get any information out of him. With my usual "goodguy" tactics, I offered him a refreshing drink of 25% and an invigorating shot of after-run oil but he wouldn't budge! I had no choice but to turn him over to the C.I.A. (Cox Intelligence Agency) This picture was taken as he was booked and finger-printed down at C.I.A. headquarters.
02-10-2003, 12:46 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
I hate to admit it but after his initial display of cowardice, he gallantly showed remarkable intestinal fortitude during the interrogation. He was determined not to reveal who his handlers were to the C.I.A. agents assembled in the room.
02-10-2003, 12:47 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
He only groaned slightly as they bent his prop slowly backward until the fibers snapped with a grinding, crunching sound; like a chicken drumstick as it's slowly torn off a thigh.
02-10-2003, 12:48 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
I could hear a long, muted moan escaping from his stoically set exhaust port as the clamp screw was turned tighter and tighter on his head. I was amazed at the excruciating pain he must have endured and yet not a word was uttered!
02-10-2003, 12:48 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
It's amazing what 220 volts will do to a normal person: involuntary muscle spasms, loud screams of agony, sudden urination; it's sickening to watch. I could see a slight trail of smoke wafting out of his tightly clenched venturi and hear just the slightest hissing of breath but incredibly, the only words he spoke were his name, displacement and serial number!
02-10-2003, 12:49 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
Suddenly, it was all over when 010, the C.I.A.'s diminutive but shrewdest agent, stepped up and whispered something softly into the infiltrator's exhaust port. The hapless prisoner screamed over and over again in an eerie, falsetto voice: "I'll tell you everything! I'll sing like a canary! Fastlash and Dave Campbell made me do it! They wanted me to steal the secret of the famous DickeyBird engine! I'll sign anything you want, just PLEASE, keep that 010 away from me!...." (To be continued)
02-10-2003, 01:25 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
ROTFLMFAO!!!
*ahem*
...................................
(The President speaking)
My fellow Nasty Northern Neolithic Norvelites:
We have recieved reports show that Cpl. "Biggie" Migoyan was the target of a cross-border prisoner snatch while manning the outpost on the Ohio/Kentucky border. Our most heartfelt feelings go to "Biggie's" family who must suffer with the knowledge that he may be brainwashed and tortured.
Surely from the photographic evidence and that which has been gained buy our own assets, "Biggie" has been tortured. The our head mechanic Dave Campbell (who alleges Biggie had an unfortunate habit of pulling his own rod off) says: "After reviewing the photos of Cpl. Muguyan, it is evident that '010' screwed the Cpl. in the ear, and the broken prop is an obvious clue when diagnosing the classic 'Rubber Fuel-Line' interrogation treatment.
We demand our brave and patriotic engine be released at once. Your craven act of deception will not go unpunished!
You have 48 hours in which to return Cpl. Migoyan or WE WILL BURY YOU!"
.................................................
More news at 11!
*ahem*
...................................
(The President speaking)
My fellow Nasty Northern Neolithic Norvelites:
We have recieved reports show that Cpl. "Biggie" Migoyan was the target of a cross-border prisoner snatch while manning the outpost on the Ohio/Kentucky border. Our most heartfelt feelings go to "Biggie's" family who must suffer with the knowledge that he may be brainwashed and tortured.
Surely from the photographic evidence and that which has been gained buy our own assets, "Biggie" has been tortured. The our head mechanic Dave Campbell (who alleges Biggie had an unfortunate habit of pulling his own rod off) says: "After reviewing the photos of Cpl. Muguyan, it is evident that '010' screwed the Cpl. in the ear, and the broken prop is an obvious clue when diagnosing the classic 'Rubber Fuel-Line' interrogation treatment.
We demand our brave and patriotic engine be released at once. Your craven act of deception will not go unpunished!
You have 48 hours in which to return Cpl. Migoyan or WE WILL BURY YOU!"
.................................................
More news at 11!
02-10-2003, 01:51 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
I have no words to say. One of our good friends has come to a horrible end in the hands of the EEE-VIL Dr. COX!!!!
The whole reason this happened is, well someone has to say it, envy!!! Pure and simple envy!!! We all know that Dickey is a closet Norvelite, he just can't admit to it in public.
Keep one eye open at all times. You have gone TOO FAR!!! At least send our lost friend to me, so that I can give him a good resting place. (What the EEE-VIL Dr COX doesn't know is that I will fix our fallen friend and hop him up to super speed and release him upon Dickey and his throng on little gooey engines at SMALL STEPS!!!!)
The whole reason this happened is, well someone has to say it, envy!!! Pure and simple envy!!! We all know that Dickey is a closet Norvelite, he just can't admit to it in public.
Keep one eye open at all times. You have gone TOO FAR!!! At least send our lost friend to me, so that I can give him a good resting place. (What the EEE-VIL Dr COX doesn't know is that I will fix our fallen friend and hop him up to super speed and release him upon Dickey and his throng on little gooey engines at SMALL STEPS!!!!)
02-10-2003, 02:42 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
*ahem*
.............................
Breaking NEWS!!!
This just in:
In a Bizarre twist of international events, Northern Norvelite Cpl. Biggie Migoyan's cousins have taken things into their own hands. All four cousins are members of the Russian Engine Mafia, and are known to be highly dangerous
In exclusive footage, our photographer shot these still images of what appears to be the four cousins taking revenge for Biggie's capture. The grainy photos show what appears to be the Collierville Ambassador to spain, Juan Cinco Conquesta held in a barbed wire cage moments before the Improved Explosive Device they made detonated right next to the Ambassador, which then touched off the 517 gallons of Propylene Oxide under the cage.
Channel 61 apologizes to the Ambassador's family for thier loss, and to out viewers for the quiality of the still photos. It seems that our photographer was in a hurry to get things in focus before getting out of Dodge and scorched his arm on the propane torch that the cousins used to ignite their cannon fuse. Some of his film is being processed by the NIA and incriminating photgraphs of the blast site with the 4 cousins in view of the camera are being reveiwed for national security.
More at 11.
.............................
Breaking NEWS!!!
This just in:
In a Bizarre twist of international events, Northern Norvelite Cpl. Biggie Migoyan's cousins have taken things into their own hands. All four cousins are members of the Russian Engine Mafia, and are known to be highly dangerous
In exclusive footage, our photographer shot these still images of what appears to be the four cousins taking revenge for Biggie's capture. The grainy photos show what appears to be the Collierville Ambassador to spain, Juan Cinco Conquesta held in a barbed wire cage moments before the Improved Explosive Device they made detonated right next to the Ambassador, which then touched off the 517 gallons of Propylene Oxide under the cage.
Channel 61 apologizes to the Ambassador's family for thier loss, and to out viewers for the quiality of the still photos. It seems that our photographer was in a hurry to get things in focus before getting out of Dodge and scorched his arm on the propane torch that the cousins used to ignite their cannon fuse. Some of his film is being processed by the NIA and incriminating photgraphs of the blast site with the 4 cousins in view of the camera are being reveiwed for national security.
More at 11.
02-10-2003, 02:50 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
I own four of these silly Norvell Big Migs, three of the four have rods that look like Dickeybird's. The one without a broken rod has never been run.
The problem is unique to last year's run of 74's only.
If you have access to a bipolar microscope you can see that the metal at the break is coarse and brittle, just bad metalurgy.
The problem is unique to last year's run of 74's only.
If you have access to a bipolar microscope you can see that the metal at the break is coarse and brittle, just bad metalurgy.
02-10-2003, 03:24 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
Originally posted by Dave Campbell
our head mechanic Dave Campbell
our head mechanic Dave Campbell
"Norvelite conspirator Dave Campbell's true occupation revealed...he's a card carrying Class A Toilet Technician!"
(Sorry Dave, you laid it up there for me, I just HAD to knock it outta the park.
)
02-10-2003, 07:06 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
I bet the other groupies dont have anything like this going on !!!!!!
LOL this is great!
L.R.
This just in!:
Norvel engines everywhere are hiring personal security from SMALL third world countries!!! Not wanting to be the next victim of the CIA they have been spending every last drop of Castor they can spare to hire these small green men to protect them!
LOL this is great!
L.R.
This just in!:
Norvel engines everywhere are hiring personal security from SMALL third world countries!!! Not wanting to be the next victim of the CIA they have been spending every last drop of Castor they can spare to hire these small green men to protect them!
02-12-2003, 05:57 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
Man...I wish I had some input.....you guys are TOO hilarious<GRIN.......Dickeybird......I think you missed your true calling........Mickey Spilane couldn't do any betterLOL.....Gator
02-19-2003, 01:13 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
So, NONE of you guys watch mystery movies or read detective novels?? NOBODY is itching to know what agent 010 whispered softly into "Biggie" Migoyan's exhaust port that made him whimper like a little schoolgirl?
02-20-2003, 02:42 PM
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OK, you Norvelites....
Agent 010 simply said to Biggie: "Has anybody here told you anything about my FAMILY? My father's name was Antonio "TD" Soprano; my mother was Angelina "Queen Bee" Soprano; my brother's name is Vincenzo "PeeWee" Soprano and my real name is Luigi "Little TD" Soprano".
"So Biggie, you wanna go have a chat with my brother PeeWee's meat grinder and put a little Russian flavor in some Italian sausage, put on some concrete overshoes and go sleep with the fishies, or you gonna tell me what I wanna know? Capisch?"
"So Biggie, you wanna go have a chat with my brother PeeWee's meat grinder and put a little Russian flavor in some Italian sausage, put on some concrete overshoes and go sleep with the fishies, or you gonna tell me what I wanna know? Capisch?"
