Nope, you'll have power on the center post and a ground on the outside post all the time when the rx is powered. Those two rows of pins are all connected to the others in the rx. The only one that changes is the signal line.
Only way to make it work like you want is to install a switch on the flap socket of the rx. It will then turn on and off the lights via you flipping the toggle on your TX.
Turnigy from Hobby King makes a nice one. I use em all the time.
http://www.hobbyking.com/hobbyking/s...arehouse_.html