A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone?  
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All Forums >> Radios, Batteries, Clubhouse and more >> RC Humor >> A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone?
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A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/12/2006 11:35:10 PM   
stinger40



Posts: 661
Joined: 5/10/2005
From: Grayson, GA, USA
Status: offline 		Here is a good pirate joke my friend told me.

A pirate walks into a bar with a shiny silver belt buckle shaped like a ship steering wheel.

He sits down at the bar and says, "Arrrggghhh, gimmie a beer."

So, the bartender gives him a beer, and the bartender starts shining glasses.

The bartender looks down at the steering wheel shaped belt buckle and says, "Excuse me, Mr. Pirate, I couldn't help but notice that your belt buckle is shaped like a ship steering wheel."

The pirate looks down and says, "Arrrggghhh, and it's driving me nuts."

I never heard it before, and I thought it was good. It might be old, but I don't know.







< Message edited by stinger40 -- 11/12/2006 11:36:47 PM >

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RE: A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/13/2006 7:46:49 PM   
OldFart1


 

Posts: 237
Joined: 12/21/2005
From: Lakewood , CA, USA
Status: offline 		As a card carrying ParrotHead, I'm required by law to have several Pirate jokes on tap

A pirate and his parrot, were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a valiant battle. While rummaging through the boat's provisions, the pirate stumbled across an old lamp. Secretly hoping that a Genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously. To the amazement of the castaways, a Genie came forth. This particular Genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three. Without giving any thought to the matter the pirate blurted out, "Make the entire ocean into rum!" The Genie clapped his hands with a deafening crash, and immediately the entire sea turned into the finest rum ever sampled by mortals. Simultaneously, the Genie vanished. Only the gentle lapping of rum on the hull broke the stillness as the two considered their circumstances

The parrot looked disgustedly at the pirate and after a tension-filled moment spoke: "Now yee've done it!! Now we're goon to have to pee in the boat!"

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RE: A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/13/2006 7:56:10 PM   
OldFart1


 

Posts: 237
Joined: 12/21/2005
From: Lakewood , CA, USA
Status: offline 		Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the waves, a captain and his crew were in danger of being boarded by a pirate ship. As the crew became frantic, the captain bellowed to his First Mate, "Bring me my red shirt!". The First Mate quickly retrieved the captain's red shirt, which the captain put on and lead the crew to battle the pirate boarding party. Although some casualties occurred among the crew, the pirates were repelled.

Later that day, the lookout screamed that there were two pirate vessels sending boarding parties. The crew cowered in fear, but the captain calm as ever bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt!". The battle was on, and once again the Captain and his crew repelled both boarding parties, although this time more casualties occurred.

Weary from the battles, the men sat around on deck that night recounting the day's occurrences when an ensign looked to the Captain and asked, "Sir, why did you call for your red shirt before the battle?". The Captain, giving the ensign a look that only a captain can give, exhorted, "If I am wounded in battle, the red shirt does not show the wound and thus, you men will continue to fight unafraid". The men sat in silence marveling at the courage of such a man.

As dawn came the next morning, the lookout screamed that there were pirate ships, 10 of them, all with boarding parties on their way. The men became silent and looked to their Captain for his usual command. The Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, "Bring me my brown pants!!

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RE: A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/13/2006 8:35:40 PM   
MinnFlyer



Posts: 19651
Joined: 4/22/2002
From: Willmar, MN, USA
Status: offline 		A Pirate was sitting in a bar. He had a hook on his right hand and a patch over his right eye. The bartender asked him how he got his injuries.

"I lost my hand in battle" said the Pirate. One of the King's officers took it off cleanly with his cutlass.

"And what about your eye?" asked the bartender.

"I was looking up into the rigging when a seagull flew over and landed a dropping right into it."

"But that wouldn't blind you" said the Bartender.

"I know" said the Pirate, "But it was me first day with the hook"

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RE: A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/13/2006 8:49:52 PM   
stinger40



Posts: 661
Joined: 5/10/2005
From: Grayson, GA, USA
Status: offline 		Minnflyer,

I've heard that joke before, but I still love it.

OldFart1,

I haven't heard that rum joke. That one was good. I have heard the shirt one, though. It still gets funnier every time.

I have another one that is more about ships, less then pirates.

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RE: A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/13/2006 8:55:24 PM   
stinger40



Posts: 661
Joined: 5/10/2005
From: Grayson, GA, USA
Status: offline 		There was a magician that performed on a cruise ship for the tourists every night.

One of the tourists came to see the show every night..... with a pet parrot.

The parrot is a loudmouth and always reveals where the magician is hiding the "hidden" objects.

"Squaaaaakkk...... It's in the shoe!!!!!!!" "Squaaaaakkkk, It's in the hat."

The magician finally snapped and shot at the bird with a pistol.

The bird dodged the bullet, and it hit the boiler in the back of the room.

The ship explodes and everyone dies except the magician and the annoying parrot.

The magician and bird are afloat on a piece of wood, when the parrot says, "Squaaaakk, okay I give up. Where is the ship?"

< Message edited by stinger40 -- 11/13/2006 8:57:56 PM >

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RE: A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/13/2006 8:59:10 PM   
OldFart1


 

Posts: 237
Joined: 12/21/2005
From: Lakewood , CA, USA
Status: offline 		I'll have to remember that one for the parrothead cruise in March

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RE: A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/14/2006 7:38:22 AM   
rcxboy



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From: Hamilton, NEW ZEALAND
Status: offline 		What was the pirate movie rated?

ARRRR!

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RE: A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/14/2006 10:22:27 AM   
BUDMAN27



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From: Galveston, TX, USA
Status: offline 		Thats funny I don,t care who you arrrrrr !

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RE: A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/14/2006 1:50:50 PM   
stinger40



Posts: 661
Joined: 5/10/2005
From: Grayson, GA, USA
Status: offline 		I've heard that one. It is still good!

What is a pirate's favorite restaraunt?

Arrrrby's

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RE: A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/15/2006 5:48:31 PM   
OldFart1


 

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Status: offline 		Added by: Cap'n Karikas (Danise in Florida), 3/15/06
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Rated: A pirate captain walks into a bar with his first mate and they sit down at the bar. Now, the pirate captain has been a little down on his luck in the world of women, know what I mean? His first mate notices some lovely piratical wenches across the bar.

"Arr, cap'n, you should go o'er thar and talk to her, ask her to dance, aye?"

The captain replied "Arrrr, but what about me one eye? What if she makes fun of it?"

"Don't worry cap'n," said the first mate. "She only has one leg! She won't say anything with that one peg leg."

Convinced, the captain went over and immediately impressed the lady as pirates will do. He asked her if she'd like to dance.

"Would EYE, Would EYE!" she exclaimed.

"Oh yeah? Well... Peg Leg! Peg Leg!" replied the insulted captain!

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RE: A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/16/2006 12:06:13 AM   
stinger40



Posts: 661
Joined: 5/10/2005
From: Grayson, GA, USA
Status: offline 		Never heard that one! That was pretty good!

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RE: A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/23/2006 1:06:02 AM   
MadMonkey


 

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Thought that was funny

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RE: A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/23/2006 1:15:39 AM   
MinnFlyer



Posts: 19651
Joined: 4/22/2002
From: Willmar, MN, USA
Status: offline 		Now that's good

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RE: A Good Pirate Joke, Anyone? - 11/25/2006 10:03:01 AM   
GabeBoudreau