let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (Full Version)

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outdoorhunting -> let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (2/17/2009 5:15 PM)

OK, guys & gals, how about I resemble that ! Old enough to know the Dead Sea when it was sick ! Ya, know that kind of stuff. Show us your best stuff !!!



outdoorhunting -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (2/17/2009 5:46 PM)

Those are good !! How about "dumber than a fistfull of riverrock" Keepem coming guys !! We all need a good laugh !!



knighttwister -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (2/18/2009 1:20 AM)

haven't seen it since the last time.
don't put you lips on it!
if brains were dynamite, he couldn't blow his nose
scarcer than hen's teeth
dumber than a doorknob
she talks like a drunken sailor
she sure is purdey when she's quiet!



vicman -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (2/20/2009 6:32 PM)

If brains were gasoline you wouldn't have enough to run a piss and motorcyle half way round a BB.

Or, If you're gonna be stupid ya gotta be tough.



Ram Jet -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (2/20/2009 9:57 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: vicman

If brains were gasoline you wouldn't have enough to run a piss and motorcyle half way round a BB.

Or, If you're gonna be stupid ya gotta be tough.


If your brains were dymamite you wouldn't have enough to blow your nose.

Bill



reincarnate -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (2/20/2009 10:58 PM)

He's so stupid, he couldn't pour water out of his boot if the instructions were printed on the heel.

She's so cheap, she wouldn't pay a nickel to see Christ walk on water.



Ram Jet -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (2/20/2009 11:05 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: reincarnate

He's so stupid, he couldn't pour water out of his boot if the instructions were printed on the heel.

She's so cheap, she wouldn't pay a nickel to see Christ walk on water.


Damn Re, I taught you everything I know and ya still don't know nothin'.

Bill



victorzamora -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (2/21/2009 12:16 AM)

For buck-teeth: He could shuck corn thru a picket fence
Ugly Girl: 1) She could make a train take a dirt road (2) She's got ten-foot pole marks all over her.
If something doesn't work: That dog don't hunt
If it's none of your concern: He ain't got no dog (or cock) in 'at fight



outdoorhunting -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (2/21/2009 3:29 AM)

He's so cheap, he wouldn't give a dime to see a pissant eat a bail of hay.



outdoorhunting -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (2/22/2009 4:58 PM)

Just thought of another. After watching "Old Yeller" (an old tear jerker movie for you younger guys) It brought a tear to this old glass eye !!



Arceenut -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (2/23/2009 4:46 AM)

As purty as a puppy under a new wagon.



bassfisher -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (2/26/2009 11:50 PM)

Finer than frog hair



jhess -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (3/6/2009 5:27 AM)

Old guys that were in the military I Ask them. What was your basic issue ? A loin cloth and a club!



scratchgolfer -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (3/10/2009 7:40 PM)

If it aint broke you aint flown it yet



Habaneroe -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (3/10/2009 11:20 PM)

My favorite NEW one is a variation on an old one: Fly it like you stole it!



Korben -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (3/11/2009 12:01 AM)

I'm so poor, I can't afford to pay attention.



Ram Jet -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (3/11/2009 12:16 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Korben

I'm so poor, I can't afford to pay attention.



Darn it Jeb, get away from the wheel barrow, ya know ya don't know nothin' bout machines!

I taught ya everything I know and ya still don't know nothin'.

Bill



Ram Jet -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (3/11/2009 12:33 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: scratchgolfer

If it aint broke you aint flown it yet



Very comforting as I sit here freting over my new Brodak Oriental CL plane. Thanks!

Bill[X(]



khodges -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (3/11/2009 5:13 AM)

Describing someone on the "slow" side

A few bricks shy of a full load....
He's not the sharpest knife in the drawer....
dumber than a bag of hammers.....
as bright as a 12V bulb on 3V.....
couldn't find his a$$ with both hands....
his cheese has slid off his cracker.....



grinder-RCU -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (3/11/2009 7:59 AM)

Thumbs like a truck.
Trim it up, screw it down. ( Bob Vila )
Low fat fries.
red leather, yellow leather. Say it fast three times.
Slippery than snot on a greased rail.
Beavers favorite swear word? damn.
When you drive past a grave yard, say to the kids in the car "people are dying to get into there". Drives them nuts.



grinder-RCU -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (3/11/2009 8:00 AM)

"That'll go over like a fart in space suit".



Ram Jet -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (3/11/2009 12:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: grinder-RCU

"That'll go over like a fart in space suit".



My dad used to say "You're runnin' around like a fart in a mitten." Does anyone know what that means?[sm=confused.gif] He also would say (when he was going to show you something really clever) "Here, I'll show you a trick with a hole in it." I'm 60 now and think I know what that means.[sm=confused.gif]

Bill



Ram Jet -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (3/11/2009 12:10 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: grinder-RCU

Thumbs like a truck.
Trim it up, screw it down. ( Bob Vila )
Low fat fries.
red leather, yellow leather. Say it fast three times.
Slippery than snot on a greased rail.
Beavers favorite swear word? damn.
When you drive past a grave yard, say to the kids in the car "people are dying to get into there". Drives them nuts.
And last but not least my boss's favorite saying " if it has t*ts or wheels it does nothing but cost you money or give you a hard time"



Your boss is a very smart man and I'm sure a-bit older than 25.

Say "Hoof Hearted" and "Half Fast" very quickly. Louis Armstrong used to say "He he, hey folks we gonna play you a song, not too fast, not too slow, just half fast. He he he he."

Bill



grinder-RCU -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (3/11/2009 11:25 PM)

List of phrases. http://www.joe-ks.com/phrases/phrases.htm#B



WMB -> RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings (3/14/2009 6:09 PM)

It will feel better when it quits hurting.



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