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  1. #126

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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

    2. Don't worry about what people think; they don't do it very often.

    3. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian anymore than standing in a garage makes you a car.

    4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

    5. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.

    6. A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention! It never fails.)

    7. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.

    8. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.

    9. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of cheques.

    10. A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good.

    11. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it. Embrace your differences. Love each other.

    12. No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes.

    13. A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

    14. Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.

    15. Opportunities always look bigger after they have passed.

    16. Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.

    17. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.

    18. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

    19. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.

    20. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.

    21. Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.

    22. It isn’t the jeans that make your butt look fat.

    23. There is a very fine line between 'hobby' and 'mental illness'.

    24. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

    25. You should not confuse your career with your life.

    26. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

    27. Never lick a steak knife.

    28. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

    29. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.

    30. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

    31. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

    32. Your friends love you anyway.

    33. Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

    34. How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?



    Cheers,

    Colin
    Where there is a Will there are Relatives.Ultra Sport Brotherhood No:11 Ultimate 10-300 Brotherhood No:13

  2. #127
    chunkyplunker's Avatar
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    My driving is fine, it's the other idiot drivers I worry about.
    Club Saito #678

  3. #128
    Bundubasher's Avatar
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    Hey Chunky,
    Driving...???? you should be flying.............
    My experience is that continental drift sometimes causes the Earth to jump up and knock a plane out of the sky......

  4. #129
    Bundubasher's Avatar
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    Open attachment, close your left eye (if you're right handed), stare with your right eye for 30 seconds at the dot on the attachment, then open your left eye...... what do you see......?
    Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails Click image for larger version. 

Name:	Pn35722.jpg 
Views:	16 
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    My experience is that continental drift sometimes causes the Earth to jump up and knock a plane out of the sky......

  5. #130
    chunkyplunker's Avatar
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    I have to drive back and forth to the field. I tried flying to it once, but I just could't balance all my my field gear on the wings. Besides the plane didn't want to lift off the the ground with me on top.
    Club Saito #678

  6. #131
    Bundubasher's Avatar
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    Hahaha, hey Plunky, then it's time for a bigger plane.......
    Cheers
    My experience is that continental drift sometimes causes the Earth to jump up and knock a plane out of the sky......

  7. #132

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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    If you create something that is idiot proof, someone else will become a better idiot.
    Howard

    Χριστῷ συνΡσταύρωμαι·

  8. #133
    chunkyplunker's Avatar
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    Tried that too, but got caught up in the power lines on takeoff.
    Club Saito #678

  9. #134
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts


    ORIGINAL: skylark-flier

    Back in the old ''horse & carriage'' days, the average speed of a 1-horse-drawn cab in NY City was 7 MPH. In 2007, the average speed of a 300hp taxicab in NY City is 7 MPH.

    That's progress?

    Dave
    No horse apples from a couple thousand horses every day has got to be worth something.
    \"I\'\'ll do the stupid thing first, then you shy people can follow.\" -FZ-

  10. #135

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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    The bibles used by the Church of England and Roman Catholics contain some extra books called the Apocrypha. One of these books, Wisdom of Sirach or Eccliasticus, mentions cats in a very complimentary fashion.

    Tom

  11. #136

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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    tackyon particles are theoretical. I am unaware of any evidence pointing to their actual existence.
    To err is human, to really mess things up requires government involvement

  12. #137

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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    here is a totally useless fact- seagulls cant fart, thats why they explode when you feed them certain food stuffs
    i wish i got 6 months paid holiday twice a year

  13. #138
    cfircav8r's Avatar
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    Diamonds dont show up on X-rays, but gummy bears do.
    The three most useless things to a pilot, the sky above you, the runway behind you, and the fuel on the ground.

  14. #139
    EdgardoJr's Avatar
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    Totally Useeless Fact: "Our Economy is Improving"
    1/5th HSP Bajer - NQD High Speed 757

  15. #140
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    In conventional airplanes the pilots seat is on the left, co-pilots on the right.
    This is reversed in helicopters.
    Lnewqban - "God will not look you over for medals, degrees or diplomas, but for scars. He has achieved success who has worked well, laughed often, and loved much." - Elbert Hubbard

  16. #141
    Arkitexas's Avatar
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    And in automobiles, the driver is often in the back seat!

    Rick
    Lone Star Flyer

  17. #142
    eddieC's Avatar
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    In the cosmic calendar, the beginning of the universe is the first second on January 1.

    All of recorded history is contained in the last 10 seconds of December 31.
    I might not be very good, but I'm fun to watch!

  18. #143

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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    another unimportant fact. if my head wasnt fashioned on i would loose it.

  19. #144
    Jim_Purcha's Avatar
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    I guess his head isn't "fastened" on.
    ORIGINAL: moe7404

    another unimportant fact. if my head wasnt fashioned on i would loose it.
    Ultra Sport Brotherhood #30

  20. #145
    chunkyplunker's Avatar
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    If Frogs didn't jump, they wouldn't bump thier butts every time they moved.
    Club Saito #678

  21. #146
    tommygun32's Avatar
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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    And they can't burp either....hence it's not a good idea to feed birds Alkaseltzer....[:@][:-]

    ORIGINAL: wolfie1

    here is a totally useless fact- seagulls cant fart, thats why they explode when you feed them certain food stuffs
    The rest of your life starts now. Go Live It!

    Team Terribles

  22. #147

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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    ok Jim_Purcha you are not to make fun of the old mans spelling. every one has something they dont do well.

  23. #148

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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    The Lowry Park Zoo in Tampa told me it was translucent as well as hollow to trap heat.
    If it\'\'s not broken, Fix it til it is!

    Murphy\'\'s Law: If it can go wrong, it will

    www.CoroPlanes.com

  24. #149

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    RE: Totally Useless Facts


    ORIGINAL: Jim_Purcha

    I guess his head isn't ''fastened'' on.
    ORIGINAL: moe7404

    another unimportant fact. if my head wasnt fashioned on i would loose it.

    that and he doesn't use a web browser with spell check.
    David

  25. #150

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    RE: Totally Useless Facts

    Have read this loooooong article, thanks.


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