The TYPICAL first flight of someone trying to teach themselves to fly lasts about 30 seconds (or less) and normally results in damage to the plane and equipment onboard. There is also a VERY HIGH probability of injuring yourself, an innocent bystander and/or some property (all of which YOU will be responsible for - remember, the AMA does provide secondary insurance to cover "little" mishaps like that.)

Your BEST chance for sucess is to find an instructor. Talk to your LHS. They should be able to put you in touch with a local club or instructor.

If you have THAT much money that you can afford to go through several planes while learning, let me know and I will send you my snail mail address - you can send the money to me.