ORIGINAL: outdoorhunting
OK, guys & gals, how about I resemble that ! Old enough to know the Dead Sea when it was sick ! Ya, know that kind of stuff. Show us your best stuff !!!
Here's some stuff mostly from my dad, some from my mom:
Shoot fire and save matches
I'll show you a trick with a hole in it
If I never se (him/her) again it will be too soon
Like s____ through a goose
Your mouth runs like a Whipperwil's a___h____ in spring time
It's cold enough to freeze the balls of a brass monkey. (This is misunderstood. On old British warships cannon balls were stored in a brass basket like device (brass monkey) on the mast)
Cheaper that a third squirt of cat p___
Tighter tha Billy-be-damed
He beat the bejesus out of it
Oklahoma socket set (an adjustable open end (Crescent) wrench
Brains of a knat
He doesn'r know s___ from Shinola
Ran like a bat out of hell
Runs like the hammers of hell
Wound-up tighter than a two bit watch
Hotter than a two bit pistol
Scarce as hen's teeth
If it was any closer it woulda bit ya
Drunker than a monkey
If (he/she) was goin' any slower (he/she) would be going backwards
My dad's definition of tact "He could tell you to go to hell and have looking forward to the trip"
He's so cheap he wouldn't give his s___ to the crows
dumber than a fence post
I wouldn't give him the sweat off my a__
Colder than a well digger's fanny
There are a few more of an ethnic orientation so I can't post them here, and I don't care to repeat them either. Prety funny though.
Bill