RE: let's hear your funny-stupid old sayings
If god wanted us to fly, we would have wings!
Tuck your head between your legs and kiss your a___ good bye!
Up s___ creek without a paddle.
Half past a monkey's a__, a quarter to his balls.
(or according)
After coming out of the restroom, "Oh yeah, I feel about 10 lbs lighter now!"
Tighter than a gnat's a__.
he couldn't fight his way out of a wet paper bag.