How many times has this happened to you? You finish your beautiful plane and do the the final checks only to find out your model is nose or tail heavy. Now you are stuck melting lead and bolting additional weight on to your pristine model.

NO MORE! Being a physicist by formal training, me and my scientist buddies set up a high energy particle accelerator in my garage and have come up with a process that makes anti-mass. I'm sure you are all familiar with anit-matter, well we have developed anti-mass. We lovingly refer to our anti-mass as NegativeMass (TM). Simply attach some of our NegativeMass (TM) to the heavy side of your plane and PRESTO!!!! Your plane will be in balance without all that stone age heavy lead.

After a generous grant and declassification by the DOD, we can now offer NegativeMass (TM) to you. Ordering is simple, just let us know how much negative mass you want and it will be shipped to your door step. Please provide a lead box and 220V outlet if we are to leave the package.

1 gram of NegativeMass (TM) - $1.4 million dollars
Shipping and Handling - $5

Warning: NegativeMass (TM) contains chemicals know to cause cancer in the state of California. If you don't live in California you'll be fine. NegativeMass(TM) is not a toy and the builder of the model assumes all responsibility for the proper use of NegativeMass (TM).

Personal checks OK?

You know Dick C and GWB all wish to take out the
flying carpet guy in afghanhoundland!

So please bill The GAO and send 22 grams of
Negative Mass (TM) to:

George and Dick
1600 Pennsylvania Ave.
Washington, DC 20202

Have you thought about using NegativeMass in growing balsa, so when you build your a/c it would weigh nothing? I can envision a 150" P38 that weighs under 3 pounds......

Hey, If I get some Neg-Mass and build a glider out of it, I could soar all day long without coming down!

I travel nearly every week could it be used to lighten my bags? I think it could be used as a personal weight loss program. Man you are going to soon have more money than Gates. LOL

What does it taste like???

I would like to be your midwest distributor.

Steve - Personal Checks are OK with ID, no starter checks please. I also accept PayPay.

PaperAir - That would probably work as long as you glue the balsa tree to the earth so it doesn't float away.

MinnFlyer - I do not recommend eating NeagativeMass(TM); however, after a lab "accident" I can tell you it tastes a lot like butterscotch pudding.

There have been some reports that NegativeMass(TM) is a scam. I'd like to address these nasty and totally unfounded rumors. Yes, the box will feel light when it arrives... that is normal. And please remember that some settling will occur during shipping. No, eating NegativeMass (TM) will NOT make you look thinner but you will weight less. I have no comment about the rumors that imply exposure to NegativeMass(TM) causes genetic mutations or that eating NegativeMass(TM) causes insanity.

I think I could get you some airline contracts if I where a distributor. I also would like to know the mass/negative mass ratio is it one to one or some other ratio.

KCFly: One gram of NegativeMass(TM) will reduce the mass of the object it is glued to by one gram, i.e. it has a -1 gram mass, so the ratio is 1:1.

Technical Specs: As you know, relativistic mass increases as one approaches the speed of light. We have found that by moving certain objects with a negative velocity, they develop negative mass. I know what your thinking... we too had to fly our planes backward for awhile. Then my lab assistant had the bright idea of rotating the NegativeMass(TM) 180 degrees in the plane and PRESTO, we could fly forward again. Just be sure to observe the arrow stamped on the outside of the shipping container and you'll be OK.

Please send a sample I think I have a process that can be used to distribute it over the entire surface area of the plane which should increase its effectiveness by 1.6 to 1 of course I will have to realign the molecule into the proper orientation for forward flight. It should work for everything but Helios and flying cars as they can fly in all directions and might be adversely affected by reverse direction or heavy side slippage more than 44.27 degrees.

Just curious, before I sink my had earned money into this...

Has this stuff been thoroughly tested and approved for inverted flight?

Fever

Hum I had not considered that maybe I should reconsider being a distributor.

I'm holding off ordering my chunk of NegativeMass(TM) for a bit. The scuttlebutt is once production of this stuff ramps up and all of the manufacturing kinks are worked out the price is going to be cut in half!

1 gram of NegativeMass (TM) - $1.4 million dollars
Shipping and Handling - $5

Even at half price it is still pretty steep.

First off, inverted flight works fine, as long as your frame of reference is moving with negative velocity with respect to the plane. This just means you need to run like mad toward the plane whenever it is inverted... minor inconvenience.

There have been rumors that I have inflated the price due to my drinking and gambling problems. That is not why it costs so much. The exchange rate of the Yen to US dollars is mainly to blame.

The Yen is dropping compared to the Dollar so the price should be coming down. LOL

Upsadasieum has been around for years!

Any old Model Builder Magazine readers around? Rememer "Heli Spheres", APRIL 1985 issue????

How about Flubber while not a mass reduction device still in a similar category.

Yeah right Flubber. Thats a Disney Movie Effect. For those of you wishing to eat it to "lose" weight. Remember it will not stay in your body long. I would suggest maybe inserting it into the lining of your shoes. Maybe like a extra insole, that way you can use it in all your shoes.
Just to make sure. Does negative mass cause radio interferance? Is it CA glueable. Does it interact poorly with our high nitro content fuels? Just something I was wondering.

Personally, I will never purchase NegativeMass ever again. I ordered 2 grams for 2.8 mil just to find out there was actually 2.0542783 grams shipped. MonkeyBoy, your particle accelerators are obviously out of calibration. When I attached to the tail, the result was a perpetual waterfall. When I added to my 2 0z. peanut scale, it took off like a hot-air balloon never to be seen again.

Does anyone know where I can find a dealer for upsidasium? I understand they all went to the AntiMass Academy and really know their gravitons. I also hear they have good quality control.

I'm not so sure about this whole thing.........................

Kind of reminds me of the time I bought those invisible fish......The tank was real nice though...

How do you measure by the gram? Is a gram not weight? And do you charge the amount by the weight, too? Then it should be free. And is NegativeMass permanent or does it need to be replacd every few years?