While I agree that a GOOD instructor is worth their weight in gold, I don't feel that a simulator is a waste of money to a newbee in any way shape or form.
What something like Phoenix or Realflight (they are both good ones, and worth the $$) will allow you to do is spend time getting thumb memory. Sure, the depth perception thing is not there (a 3D TV with a 2d-3d convertor helps), but the ability to just 'fly' with-out a single repercussion is a major bonus being as your instructor will not likely want to spend every waking minute waiting for you to call just so you can go fly with him/her - as most of them have a life as well. The sim will allow you to do just that, and fly when it suits you.
Get accustomed to using the weather settings in a sim, having cross winds etc with variable gusts and direction of wind is great for adding some real world feel into the mix.
One key point I will add, set yourself goals if using a sim. They are easy to get into the habit of 'game mode' (ie just playing around) being as there are no repercussions. Try to always have an idea of what you need to master, and then work on it. Move on to the next point to 'master' only when the initial thing has become 2nd nature. It is a tool after all said and done, and needs to be used like one.
Just to point out their benefit, my first EVER plane landing was due to a dead stick 15ft above the ground just as I had taken off. If I had not spent hours on my sim (phoenix) practicing dead stick landings prior to that point, then I would have lost that plane, right there and then, end of story. At that exact point where I got it back down without a single scratch on it, that sim paid for itself - period.