Geez! I'm going to assume that VFW post is now defunct - being that those (probable) WWI & WWII folk have all died off by now.
While I was never "IN" Vietnam, I flew over it dozens of times - but it was my station in "occupied" Berlin that got me an invite into VFW (which I didn't take). Something about Vietnam turned EVERYBODY off back then. Gotta say, I'm like you - rather put off by the lack of appreciation and sometimes outright hostility toward military (all military) at that time.