I learned to fly partly in real life, but I really gained most of my skills from using a simulator. It was Microsoft Flight Sim verison 4 on a 486 (66mhz processor). 16 colors and 2 joysticks! Now I fly helis and airplanes in real life and I use real flight deluxe very often. When I started, I had to fly the simulator, because I wasn't old enough to drive myself to the field. It was either figure out a way to fly on the computer, or fly once every other week when I could talk my parents into taking me. So, I found a way to get somewhat crude equipment to work.

My opinion about simulators is that you have to want to use them. They can be very valuable tools, but if you really don't want to use it, you can find plenty of excuses as to why you are wasting your time. On the other hand, take two enthusiastic and open-minded pilots who are willing to utilize all available resources, and give them identical resources, but suppliment one with a simulator. In the end, you will have a good pilot and a better pilot.

I find that most of the people who complain about simulators fit into a few personality profiles.
Some have a very short attention span, and can't sit still long enough.

Option 1:
Many (very many!) are not capable of operating computers confidently, and they get discouraged because they cannot understand how to make the program do what they want it to do. Some of these types ask for help, and they do fine. Others are too proud, and are just sim haters for life. (my dad is a prime example... he won't have anything to do with them because he just gets so frustrated with configuring the programs). A similar problem in this situation is getting the hardware to work; often getting a simulator to run really conveniently takes a lot of creativity and experimentation (with different controler configurations etc), and some folks just can't handle that. In addition, some don't realize that they have access to the equipment, and fall into this category.

Option 2:
Some expect the simulator to teach them how to fly; this doesn't happen. You teach yourself how to fly, and the simulator is just a method of doing so. When they "play" on the simulator, they complain because it isn't improving their flying skills. There is a big difference in just bumming around crashing and doing useful training exercises to improve your skills. Flight training with a sim is the takes creativity too; you have to utilize the benefits and suppliment the downfalls accordingly. A good example is landing orientation. It is very difficult to learn to set up a landing approach on a simulator, because you have no peripheral vision, or spatial orientation (which way your head is pointed, and which way your feet are pointed). Thus, finding the runway can be impossible unless your brain is capable of keeping up with where you are in the sky based on sky textures. I was flying sims for 5 years or so (and landing RC planes in real life) from the RC perspective before my simple mind was capable of such a calculation. If you learn quickly, you might be able to do this sooner. The simulator has some really good areas too; you can gain uncanny orientation if you use the simulator properly... think of rolling circles in airplanes, and piroetting flips in helicopters. The only thing between your properly set up machine flying figure 8s and your machine flying these manuvers is knowing which way to move the stick when it is upside down, right side up, and everywhere in between.

Option 3:
Another profile is the type of people who just enjoy being outside; you can't smell fresh air as easily at your computer as you can in the real world.

I'd say most simulator complainers fit into one of these categories.

Either way, it is just a hobby; if someone is insecure about simulators, or doesn't enjoy them for whatever reason, then that person shouldn't use them. We do this to have fun, right?