That's definately a horrible experience and sounds like a horrible club. If I were in your position, here's what I would do.

First do as DBCherry suggested and get a simulator!!! G2 is great, because it's realistic enough to learn to fly, comes with a controller, and is going very cheap right now because G3 is out (which I don't like, but others have had success with it). Aerofly Pro, or Aerofly Pro Deluxe are both pretty good (physics on deluxe are much better) but either is better in my opinion than G2... Aerofly Pro is pretty cheap (about $100 now), and deluxe is around $170... Neither have a "controller" though.. But since you already have a transmitter, you'll be fine... They do also make a version of deluxe that comes with a controller (around $200 i think)... Reflex is also an alternative, but it's expensive and in my opinion no better than AFPD...
Here's the important part though... DON'T TREAT IT AS A GAME!.. Use it as a tool! In other words, there's no reason to load up a plane, goose the throttle, throw it violently around the sky barely under control, and then crash into a tree and do it over and over again... WORK on your flying skills.. Start with take off... Start down the runway advancing the throttle somewhat slowly... work on using the rudder to keep the plane going in a nice straight line down the runway. When you lift off, keep a nice shallow climb rate, don't let it "jump" into the air, keep the wings level till you get about 20 to 30 feet off the ground, and then hit the space bar.... (resets)... Do it again and again until it looks pretty..... AND IS CONSISTANT... One pretty one doesn't count.. you have to be able to do it over and over again...
Once you've got that, now start the next phase... You initial turn... roll the wings to about a 30 degree angle so the plane turns AWAY from where your standing... On a trainer (like the PT40) you'll need to back off the ailerons, but still hold just a small amount to keep the angle consistant.... At the same time, as the wings start to roll into the turn, you'll need to start feeding in some up elevator... (pulling back on the stick)... Not too much, just enough to keep the nose level OR since this is your initial turn, you want to go for consistant climbing, so keep the nose up a little... Once you've completed a nice slow 180 degree turn, (actually just before, it takes a little timing), roll the wings back out level and start a nice straight pass parrallel to the runway... Once you get past the opposite end of the runway, spacebar again and do it over.... Again till it's consistant and looks pretty....
Once that's good, then just add another turn and another leg... This time, once your in the middle of the downwind leg (the straight portion right after your initial turn), cut the throttle back to just over 1/2... You may have to bump the trim tabs a bit to keep the nose nice and level... so it's not climbing or diving on you... Now once you get to the opposite end, turn another 180 degree turn, and bring it right back down over the runway (at altitude though)... When you get to the end again, make another 180... Just hold that pattern... Each time practice making your turns nice and smooth, and keeping your legs nice and straight and parallel to the runway... (the upwind leg should be right over top the runway)...
Once you've got a good traffic pattern going, and it looks good, you'll have to practice with the timing, but when you are on your downwind leg, just about ready to make your turn, cut the throttle all the way back to idle..... Go ahead and complete your turn now, but LET the nose drop... You want to keep your speed up, but lose the altitude... We're not talking pointing it straight at the ground here, but let her come down... When you complete that turn, you should be at say 20 or 25 feet off the ground, and close to the end of the runway... Now... Level the wings... FOCUS on the wings... DON'T worry about where the ground is at this point... Just keep the wings level AND the nose level or just slightly pointed up.... You'll notice that even thought the nose is level or pointed up a bit, you'll still be sinking.... That's cause your now on the glidescope... Keep the wings LEVEL! As you slow down, you'll have to start feeding in slight amounts of up elevator to keep the nose up.... At some point, you're going to have one of two things happen... You'll either hit the ground with more elevator left and probably bounce a couple times.... but hey you landed in one piece right?!? OR you'll run out of elevator too soon, the plane will stall and probably not be in one piece depending on altitude.... Keep working on this over and over.... Once things click, you'll be able to do it without even thinking... What you are shooting for is to "run out" of elevator JUST at the same moment the wheel touch... You'll know when you do it right, cause it'll be the prettiest damn landing you've ever seen... Once you get a "good one" you'll be able to recognize when you're not on the right glidescope... Your going to come in way off the runway, or too late, too early, etc... If your going to hit before the runway, you can try stretching it a bit by adding a little throttle... If at ANY point you're not happy with what's happening, GIVE HER FULL THROTTLE and climb out.. One thing about landings that people sometimes seem to forget... They are ONLY mandatory when the engine has quit... NEVER settle for an "okay" landing.. If things don't look or feel right, power up and go around for another shot... Once you can take off, fly a pattern, and land, all consistantly without crashing, then you can start "mixing" it up a bit... do some loops and rolls (rolls are somewhat difficult with a trainer, they'll look ugly, but that's okay)... The idea here is at some point the your going to "lose" the plane... You'll not quite be able to tell it's attitude, or you'll just get disorientated... The idea is to "train" yourself to be able to pick up quickly WHAT the attitude of the plane is (they generally have REAL bad attitudes. ) and correct for it quickly... Last but not least, you may want to practice a few deadstick landings.... Any sim should have the ability to "kill" the engine... Don't set yourself up for a perfect landing though... Practice killing the engine with the plane in all different spots... The idea is as soon as the engine dies you want to figure out the best way to get the plane down SOMEWHERE on the runway... Sometimes you have to make and extra turn or something to bleed off some extra altitude or airspeed... It takes practice but you'll get it...

NOW!......

You're going to have NO problem flying the real thing now... BUT! don't let this confidence persuade you to take your plane out on your own... Chance are you'll be fine, but without another set of eyes, you may not even have your plane or radio set up right... You need to bite the bullet and drive the 50+ miles to the other club... Take it out to the field and explain to the guys what has happened..... That you've practiced on a sim until you were blue in the face, but you didn't want to test your skills by yourself... I'm SURE there will be someone there that will check over the plane for you, make sure everything is kosher, and probably even volunteer to maiden it for you... At this point, HOPEFULLY they'll be nice enough to offer to buddy box you and let you try out your sim skills... Have one of them take the plane off and let you fly it around... See... not much different than the sim huh? Maybe even easier huh? Now, have your "buddy" land it and this time you take it off... Feel the same? Now cut the throttle, bring her in for a landing... If it looks and feels right, go for it... Otherwise, abort about 10 feet off the ground and try again till things feel right...

There should be no reason that after a couple tanks of gas, with all that sim time, that you'll feel MORE than comfortable with going out to your own field to fly by yourself...

One last note... The sim will let you do a lot of things, but use some common sense... NEVER fly behind yourself... Draw an imaginary line parallel to the runway and generally extended the entire length of the runway or more... Never fly behind that line... Never fly over top of yourself, etc... Always make sure when you start the engine that something or someone is holding the tail... Never stick your fingers in a spinning prop.. You know, that kinda stuff... Read the AMA guidlines and safety code... You'll be just fine...

In fact, my guess is, once you get some good experience on you, you'll probably make the first "non-arsehole" instructor for that club... Might breath some new life into it. Who knows how many people have left that club because of being treated the same way you were...

Enjoy... Hope this helped!