RW, you're right! The car/airplane with a drive-by-wire/fly-by-wire would not be remote controlled. But the subsystems would be. Very good point. That is actually what I was attempting to ask... just not enough clarity of mind or vocabulary.
You are 100% right and I'm guilty of trying to stir the pot.
This isn't something that can be measured with a stick. It just has to meet the right criteria. It would still be remote controlled if you were holding a receiver/servo in one hand and the radio in another.
You can hang your hat on this-
Remote controlled = being controlled from a location not coincident with the object
We use the wording "Radio Control" to be specific about what type of remote control we use.