I'll have a go.

"After unloading this buttload of planes behind me, I discovered I left my TX at home!! FNJARRRRR!!!!!"
"Honey, am I turning green yet? *No dear, but theres a crack in your pants* ..haha, very funny, woman.."
"Hi newcomer, Im the club owner, DONT MESS WITH US! ... and welcome or something"
"Yeah I parked my chevvy on your 1:3 Edge 550.. Wanna make summin of it??"

Meh, others try, I suck at this.