Well I have to admit that most of the 40%'s in AFPD feel very easy to fly stock with no turbulence or wind and sim speed set at 100%. I don't fly 40%ers, but it is hard to beleive that they fly that easy(130% feels much closer to what the stock defult sim speed should be). Take that same plane and add weight, turbulence and a bit of wind, turn up the sim speed to 140-160% and the 40%er now flys like the 23%ers I fly. If you want to go a step further take the right plane(black extra, Katana, QQyak) and do the same thing with it and you will have your hands full.

I guess I am not going for realism because most of the time I start with a difficult plane and the parameters cranked so that it flies more difficult than my real planes. It seems that pushing this envelope helps me progress faster, wiring the brain(developing neuropathways) at a faster rate than if I was practicing with the sim set at a more realistic setting. A lot of the time after practicing at this more challenging setting I will drop back to a more realistic setting and see that I have made progress.
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I have herd that it is quite easy to get the planes in G3 to fly like the ones in AFPD, but the default plane flies closer to the way I like to practice.

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I am not sure about reflex--being able to make the plane easier to fly, but it sounds like the default is difficult also.