RE: Flying without and instructor
Get a slow and easy electric foamy plane first. They are not expensive, they seem pretty tough and they are easy to repair. Something like a GWS Slow Stick or Beaver.
The main disadvantage is that they do not tolerate much wind.
Simulators can help a lot but there is still a big difference between flying "ones and zeros" on a PC and committing a couple of hundred dollars worth of equipment to the sky.