After reading this thread and all the "expert" comments and "humor", I think all of you who posted on this thread need to check out Mudsurfer1234's gallery. Then you might see some real humor and a budding expert. A lot of good advice is given for the average newbie, but not everyone is average.
My guess is in the 2 1/2 years that have passed since he posted last, that he's already miles ahead of many of you.