1. I want servos strong enough to do 3D
My Carden Cap 40% flew with 5945's and with 3D! My 40% Extra 300 flew with 5955's with two on the ailerons and one on each elevator.

2. I want servos that are going to hold up
TG gears and the gears in the Hitec's last longer than JR. I know I fly both.

3. I don't want to break the bank on servos
Hitecs can be had cheaply, $86 each at servo city.

4. Do all the servos need to be the same?
If you run more than one on a surface then yes.
However, you can certainly use different servos for your elevators, rudder, throttle, etc.