I am among the ranks of the self-learned. I'm also one of those methodical, nitpicky types. I think many years of fiddling with r/c cars helped too.
I had a lesson or two when I was around nine on my father's telemaster--buddy boxes weren't invented yet. I tried again with a two channel glider in high school, and got to the point that I could control the plane the 45 seconds I could keep it in the air off a high start.
Then, a few years out of college, I was flipping through one of my father's AMA mags while visiting and saw ads for the (then)new GWS tiger moth and pico cub. I picked up the cub, my friend bought the tiger moth, and we decided the instructions in the box were enough to get us flying.
Somehow, we both learned to fly those flitty little things in a dimly lit parking lot...at night...in the dead of winter.
In retrospect, it's like we were TRYING to stack the odds against our successfully learning to fly
Anyway, after learning to fly that cub, I put together a Kadet LT-25 and rejoined the club. I let the instructor maiden the plane for me, but after trimming it out, he handed me the transmitter and walked away after watching me fly for a minute. That was about 5~6 years ago and I've been advancing my skills ever since.