Hi there!

Your ailerons probably look too wide now because when you installed the hinges, you had to leave a small gap between the wing and the aileron to allow the aileron to move. I woudn't worry about this, it's merely cosmetic and as soon as you stop worrying about it you won't notice it any more!

As to your second question, if you "flex the aileron directly" I assume you are doing it from the trailing edge (back edge) of the aileron. Moving the aileron from there gives you a much better "lever" than the torque rod is using, as it is located right at the hinge line, so it will be easier. You should be OK. Install you aileron servo and hook up your receiver/battery etc. If your servo can move the aileron to it's full deflection and return to centre without buzzing or otherwise complaining you are good to go.

Most importantly, have a veteran check your plane out thoroughly before it's first flight!

Have fun!