LOL sorry but you tell a good story Just throw the gear in the garbage. If this is your first plane, you wont be able to land on them anyways and they just get bent up. Take them off and hand launch it. With the plane in your left hand and the elevators up about 3mm in your right hand, aim the plane about 20* up. Go to full thottle with your chin, and throw it. Itll climb straight out.

To land just line up the runway, cut the power and glide it in on its belly. This thing wants to glide forever! The other day i had 25klm winds and I had only 5% power on and it just hovered over the runway with "0" ground speed for about 10 secounds and then I just let down onto the ground.

Let us know how your next attempt goes