Flying Scotsman

As a Scotsman living in the US, I thought I would share this interesting story (it isn't true - I hope)

DEPRESSED MAN DIAGNOSED AS "SCOTTISH"


Alistair McGregor, an expatriate Scottish man living in America, was recently diagnosed as clinically depressed, tanked up on anti-depressants and scheduled for controversial Shock Therapy when doctors realized he wasn't depressed at all.............only Scottish.


'Not depressed, just Scottish' Mr. McGregor, a Scottish man whose
characteristic pessimism and gloomy perspective were interpreted as serious clinical depression, was led on a nightmare journey through the American psychiatric system.


Doctors described McGregor as suffering with Pervasive Negative
Anticipation - a belief that everything will turn out for the worst,
whether it's trains arriving late, Scotland's chances at winning any
international sports event or even his own prospects to get ahead in life and achieve his dreams.


"The satisfaction Mr. McGregor seemed to get from his pessimism seemed particularly pathological," reported the doctors. "They put me on everything - Lithium, Prozac, St John's Wort, Ginseng", said Mr. McGregor."They even told me to sit in front of a big light for an hour a day or I'd become suicidal. I kept telling them this was all pointless and they said that it was exactly that sort of attitude that got me here in the first place."


Running out of ideas, his doctors finally resorted to a course of "weapons grade MDMA", the only noticeable effect of which was six hours of speedy repetitions of the phrases "mustn't grumble" and "not too bad, really". It was then that Mr. McGregor was referred to a psychotherapist.


"Suicidal?" Dr Isaac Horney explored Mr. McGregor's family history and couldn't believe his ears. "His story of a childhood growing up in the drab back streets of a windswept gray town where it rained every day, treeless streets of identical run-down houses and passionately backing a football<soccer> team who never won, seemed to be typical depressive idea! or false memory.
Mr. McGregor had six months of therapy but seemed to mainly want to talk about the weather - how miserable and cold it was in winter and later how difficult and wet it was in summer. I felt he wasn't responding to therapy at all and so I recommended drastic action - namely ECT or shock treatment".


"I was all strapped down on the table and they were about to put the rubber bit in my mouth when the psychiatric nurse picked up on my accent," said Mr. McGregor. "I remember her saying 'Oh my God, I think we're making a terrible mistake'." Nurse Alice Sheen was a big fan of Scottish comedy giving her an understanding of the Scottish psyche. "Classic comedy
characters like Chick Murray, Will Fife and The Crankies, all hopeless cases with No chance of ever doing well or escaping their circumstances," she explained to the baffled US medics. "In Scotland, being depressed to the point of suicidal is considered the norm and is not seen as pathological at all." Identifying Mr. McGregor as Scottish changed his diagnosis from 'clinical depression' to 'rather quaint and charming' and he
was immediately discharged from hospital, with a selection of brightly coloured leaflets and an "I love New York" T-shirt.

Ed Smith

A noble effort, truly a noble effort. Probably over the heads of most natives of this continent. Unless we have TV canned laughter telling us when to laugh we can no longer recognise humour. Even the canned laughter gets it wrong.

Ed S

majortom-RCU

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And then of course there is the school janitor on "The Simpsons," who is off the deep end of Scottishness. Scotty, the engineering officer on Star Trek, always had bad news, hopeless difficulty and impending disaster for his lines. Scotch moroseness was always good for a laugh on Monty Python. The psychiatrist on the BBC series "The Singing Detective" was Scottish, because shrinks are generally drawn from the ranks of people who are already crazy themselves--an useful trait in recognizing and dealing with craziness in others. However, the choice epigram on the topic comes from that German guy, whose name is on the tip of my tongue but stuck there, anyway he said "When dealing with the insane, the best method is to pretend you are sane." God bless the Scotch, they make the rest of us feel a little happier by comparison. I myself find crazy people much more interesting than the well-adjusted potatoes in the field. But I'm OK, as long as I have un-cooperative and contrary model airplanes to stir up my frustrations and vent my rage on. If my shop was video monitored, they'd have committed me by now. I generally feel good when the rotten little #####'s crash, because then I feel I've gotten even with them.

Jim_McIntyre

Uh, that's Scots not Scotch as in the drink.

Now gi oudda ere, ye randi b#stard, do'n ya kin is gon'a rain?!!

majortom-RCU

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Actually, I meant the scotch, not the scots. Nice avatar, Mac! If you ever get tired of it, send me an e-mail.

majortom-RCU

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I am curious though, how could you tell I was randy?

Jim_McIntyre

Dunno, maybe your fantasizing about your shop being video monitored?

Thanks for the compliment on my Tigermoth. Sorry, "ach! it'll be a cold day in hades when a let 'er go!"

She is a bit jealous of the time Ive been spending with my triplane lately though.

seafury_fb11

Yeah, it's pretty sad that the media sees the general population that way. Personally, I think it's a blatant insult to my intelligence that they perceive me to be so brainless that I can't decide what is funny and what is not on my own. I refuse to watch any show that uses canned laughter because it is just so damned irritating. But I guess I'm sort of getting off on a tangent here, so I climb down off my soapbox now.

Russ.

TheEdge

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PESH

Craig-RCU

Ed,
Are you Scottish too?

greg-RCU

Actually being Canadian I quite understood the humor in the story. Canadian do love to laugh at themselves too.

On American media (which we get lots of!): My 10 year old an I were watching one of those reality shows like 'cops'. The episode was filmed in Austrailia and the people of course all had rather thick accents. My son asked me "why are there subtitles? They're speaking English!"
What could I say?

Ed Smith

[B]

>>Ed,
Are you Scottish too?

Flying Scotsman

There is an elderly chap at our field who doesn't fly that often but spends his time watching others or yapping....a really friendly, nice guy. The funny thing he always says when folks ask him how he is:

"I'm doing great ! Every day above the ground is a great day"!

Always brings a smile to my face.

Crash_N_Burn

I liked it, Flying Scotsman!

Isn't is true that the Scots invented copper wire by fighting over a penny and stretching it?

Well, my dad (a Healy) was born in Aberdeen, so I guess I should be a little more frugal with my R/C expenditures, but I'm not.....

...Maybe that trait comes from my mom who was born on the island of Madeira...

....Actually, I think it is just a character flaw...