label instructions on consumer goods.
01-27-2006, 04:32 AM
#1
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label instructions on consumer goods.
Further proof that the human race is doomed because of stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
On a Myer hairdryer:
"Do not use while sleeping".
(Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Chips:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Palmolive soap:
"Directions: Use like regular soap".
(And that would be how???)
On some frozen dinners:
"Serving suggestion: Defrost".
(But, it's just a suggestion).
On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert
(printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down".
(Well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating".
(And you thought????...)
On packaging for a K-Mart iron:
"Do not iron clothes on body".
(But wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:
"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication".
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we
could just get those 5 year olds with head colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid:
"Warning: May cause drowsiness".
(And...I'm taking this because???)
On most brands of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only".
(As opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use".
(Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Nobby's peanuts:
"Warning: contains nuts".
(Talk about a news flash!)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts".
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
I don't blame the company, I blame the parents for this one:
On a child's superman costume:
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly".
On a Swedish chainsaw:
"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals".
(Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
WE ARE DOOMED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
On a Myer hairdryer:
"Do not use while sleeping".
(Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Chips:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special?)
On a bar of Palmolive soap:
"Directions: Use like regular soap".
(And that would be how???)
On some frozen dinners:
"Serving suggestion: Defrost".
(But, it's just a suggestion).
On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert
(printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down".
(Well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating".
(And you thought????...)
On packaging for a K-Mart iron:
"Do not iron clothes on body".
(But wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:
"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication".
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we
could just get those 5 year olds with head colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid:
"Warning: May cause drowsiness".
(And...I'm taking this because???)
On most brands of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only".
(As opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use".
(Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Nobby's peanuts:
"Warning: contains nuts".
(Talk about a news flash!)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts".
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
I don't blame the company, I blame the parents for this one:
On a child's superman costume:
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly".
On a Swedish chainsaw:
"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals".
(Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
WE ARE DOOMED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
02-04-2006, 08:33 AM
#3
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Location: New Albany,
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RE: label instructions on consumer goods.
'tain't a toy?? 
... dun didn't no dat.[sm=bananahead.gif]. Most modelers buy aircraft as toys. If it's not a toy, then what is is?
If there weren't idiots in this world, we wouldn't have to put up with crap. I did have a favorite... the one about the Sweedish Chainsaw... The idiots at the "unknown" sweedish company would never have to be liable for the stupidity of umm... YOU KNOW. LOL. Maybe there are freakin' idiots in Sweeden. Also, the stupidity of the writers of "do not turn upside-down." on the freakin' bottom of the box!!![sm=confused.gif]
Matt
... dun didn't no dat.[sm=bananahead.gif]. Most modelers buy aircraft as toys. If it's not a toy, then what is is?If there weren't idiots in this world, we wouldn't have to put up with crap. I did have a favorite... the one about the Sweedish Chainsaw... The idiots at the "unknown" sweedish company would never have to be liable for the stupidity of umm... YOU KNOW. LOL. Maybe there are freakin' idiots in Sweeden. Also, the stupidity of the writers of "do not turn upside-down." on the freakin' bottom of the box!!![sm=confused.gif]
Matt
02-04-2006, 06:53 PM
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RE: label instructions on consumer goods.
i never understood why there is a warning on hairdryers that say "keep away from water"i know i'll get zapped and die if it falls in the tub with me ...... but my hair has to be wet for me to dry it. [>:]
