16 Gauge wire should work fine 14 would be better.
I'm not totally sure what you mean by the connector for charging. I would use deans connectors.
- One female deans on the battery
- One Male deans connected with 2 Females to split the power and distribute it. Called a Parallel Y connector
- One Male deans on the ESC
- One Male deans for the lighting power
- One Male deans for the charger
You would then unplug the female deans on the battery connected to the y connector and plug the charger lead in to the battery.
If you are only using a small amount of LED's for the boat I would have each LED using its own resistor. The resistor would be place in series with the LED and each LED/Resistor set would be in parallel coming off the male deans connector and switch.
To determine the resistor needed you need to know the forward voltage and current of the LED. Then plug all the numbers in to this calculator.
http://led.linear1.org/1led.wiz
The Diagram was quickly drawn and only shows limited detail.
Ryan