4 recent posts on mail order purchases two mentioned not telling their wives how much the RC "goodies" cost. How many of us do that? And why? Care to elaborate?

Its easier to tell her then to have her find out later. Just refer to all the recent shoes and purses that she has bought. That usually works.

I've been honest with my wife on costs from first dating. Kinda hard to get out of it after she already knows what things cost.

ed

I agree. If you tell her up front you may have to "discuss" it for a bit. If you run out and spend a bunch of money without "discussing" it first, it tends to be a problem.

I think it is a respectful thing to do also. I would not be happy if my wife went out and spent a significant amount of money without consulting me either. When I say significant, I mean over a couple hundred bucks.

Without risking being philosophical, that is what marriage is all about.. trust. If you start deceiving or keeping things from one another it leads to big problems. To me, my wife is more important than that new airplane. I don't know about your wife, but mine is not exactly completely thrilled when I spend the money. But, we discuss it and if it is a significant amount of money we usually "plan" the purchase when it is the best time financially for us.

I guess I have rambled on enough. But I think it is foolish not to tell her how much it costs. She WILL find out anyway, she's female! [sm=spinnyeyes.gif]



Wings,

The way we work it is through a budget. We have a budget each month and have been doing so since 1989. I take all of our income each month (she works too), figure all expenses. We have a ledger book that this goes into, and everytime we buy something it gets accounted for in writing. In the budget, there are two columns, one for her and one for me. The agreement is that we can both spend our money for whatever we want. Now it is not a lot, so obviously, there are times that we either must save from month to month, or we talk it out between us. If we spend more than our alotted amount, we must pay it back (kinda like credit without interest) in the budget the next month. This works great for us, and for other things as well.

Of course I tell her.

By the way, your poll only has one option.

Wings hit the nail on the head! You don't stay married very long if there is no trust and respect. I tell my wife what it costs every time. It does make it easier if you plan for it and work together on the budget. (I've been married for almost 24 years!!)

My "Significant Other" and I both work. We share the bills and expenses. She does what she wants with her "extra" money and so do I. We help each other out if need be but other then that she doesn't care what I spend on things nor do I give her a hard time on what she does with her money. If she asks I tell her, no secrets. Works well for us and keeps discussions civil. I will admit she rasied an eyebrow when she went with me to the hobby shop one day and saw what 6 digital servo's cost for a 30% plane!

I agree with Wings. If you have to hide it, get a different hobby because like any other addiction that you have to hide, it's going to end up causing you problems. As for the initial question, no I don't tell my wife how much I spent. She's normally there with me when I spend it, so the guy ringing me up tells her.

I don't have one, so I get to spend as much as I want.

My friends wife never realized how much RC stuff he had until they moved. That was not a good thing. You are better telling her up front. If she finds out later, your toast.

Obviously you guys haven't been married very long.
There is an art to this:
1. You simply don't get in the situation where you are asked. (Hide the Kit, motor or whatever. Bring it out after she's been on a walmart spree.
2. Have the box delivered to the office.
3. Drop hints well before a birthday.
4. Show her the plane, tell her that you have had it awhile, that you are saving for a new motor. Begging for sympathy works wonders.
Use your imagination, she does.

Well, seeing as she is probably reading this, that's blown it for you!



-David C.

Slopoke, after 17 years I am right there with you man, everything I get cost twenty bucks. Every now and then like a kit or radio I tell but the average is twenty bucks.

Don't have to. I usually just mention an item and it show up in my workshop. She is a really great girl!! Lets see, whats next - GP Eagle?? What a lady!!

I don't think hiding is the answer. Sooner or later she will see a new plane or toy in the hangar. I try not to go overboaqrd with my hobby/obsession and she does the same with her purchases. Also, I guess I am quite lucky. She buys me planes and encourages me to spend time with RC knowing that it relaxs me and it is something that I truly enjoy. For christmas she bought me a new TX and for our anniversay a Tiger .60.

Never ever.
Anymore, that is.
I don't quiz her on her purchases either, anymore.
Mutual deal.
No grief.

My wife totally knows what this stuff costs. I usually agonize over a purchase for months. She gets sick of hearing me blather on about it and finally says, "Just go and buy it!".

I've never hidden a purchase from her...no reason to.

Do you realize what a pair of Manolo Blahniks or a Kate Spade purse cost? Turbines are a steal!

HA HA
Cant Hide it she knows all the good hiding places. Cant lie to her cause she wants the same thing only bigger. She's already figured out that the smaller the box the more it cost. If I buy a big Kit she wants it built NOW.....she say's "dont want to wait a year to fly it". If I buy something small she says ..Why did you waste money on the dinky piece of junk you know I only fly things that cost $2000.00 or more.

The very worst thing I ever did was let my big bird buddies teach her to fly.......now she wants a 40% TOC Ultimate....LOL

Thats what you get when you get one thats turned on by electro/mechanical stuff the way you are. Computers, motors, airplanes, boats, cars you name it .....if it goes fast makes noise she likes it.

LOL thats why I love her so much.

JDS

I was modeling before we got married so she has a basic idea that this is not an inexpensive hobby. Our 61st anniversary will be on 18, DEC. I wouldn't think of not being open about what I buy and she knows I wouldn't make a very expensive purchase unless she knew about it. I found the pickup I wanted and took her to see it. She asked if I REALLY wanted it and I got it. As to hobby supplies she knows my average purchase is about $150/175 a month, not every month, sometimes twice in one month. No complaints. If she wants something she gets it. Again, no complaints. The problem is she only likes clothes and diamonds and her closet is full. I usually buy the diamonds for her but if she sees something she wants she mentions it and I still buy it for a gift or special occasion, sometimes no occasion at all, just because I love her. I have more expensive taste so I want to buy the best she's a bit more thrifty. We both grew up during the great depression and I've found that cheaper is often more expensive. I won't tolerate second class stuff.

Gee, must be nice....

I like many others in this thread am on a budget plan. Each month my wife tells me how much I was under and may add to the next months amount or how much I was over and must subtract from the amount. She is really a great girl, and since I am just starting out in the hobby really, there are alot of things I needed and still need up front and will most likely never buy again unless it breaks, ie: my Futaba 9C or my starter... This being the case she is very understanding and knows I will be spending every penny of my budget on RC for a few months as I build my RC base, she even used a bit of her budget this month and bought me my second plane, a ModelTech Magic Extra 300 ARF. I cannot complain she is a wonderful girl, we have only been married for just over a year but met in the 4th grade, and lived 2 blocks from each other growing up so there is nothing we do not know about each other. Our relationship and past lives are so open and familiar to each other that hiding something from her now would be impossible. Well, that and the fact that she does all the bills and checkbook balancing

ZK

Why am I not surprised that it "was not a good thing"?

Honesty, and absolute trust in your spouse is essential to navigate life. I say this is a "no brainer".

It's morally corrupt to do otherwise.

I usually tell my wife that I will be in the 300.00 range. After I get the OK I order everything. Then I give her the old. "Sorry Honey, I forgot that I needed an engine" She gets mad for a few minutes then she is ok.

She writes all the checks, and makes sure I have anough money to play!

Sideshow, these guys don't even know what they are, unless their wives make them watch Sex in the City.

I'd lie about what it all costs except she can tell when I'm lieing so I just tell the truth.